Tonglen Meditation Instructions

{From Grace and Grit by Ken Wilber}

buddha-meditation

Visualize someone you know and love who is suffering — an illness, a loss, depression, pain, anxiety, fear. As you breathe in, imagine all of that person’s suffering — in the form of dark, black, smokelike, tarlike, thick and heavy clouds — entering your nostrils and traveling down into your heart. Hold that suffering in your heart. Then, on the outbreath, take all of your peace, freedom, health, goodness and virtue, and send it out to the person in the form of healing, liberating light. Imagine they take it all in and feel completely free, released and happy.

Do that for several breaths.

Then imagine the town that person is in, and on the inbreath, take in all the suffering of that town, and send back all of your health and happiness to everyone in it. Then do that for the entire state, the entire country, the entire planet, the universe. You are taking in all the suffering of beings everywhere and sending them back health and happiness and virtue.

Sí hubo genocidio. Yes, there was a genocide in Guatemala.

Guatemala Genocide Trial

Guatemala is where I have chosen to live for almost four years now. For the first three, I lived in the capital city and worked for the most elite private school in the country.

When I taught a unit on the Holocaust last year and we discussed the ongoing genocides in Africa and elsewhere, many refused to draw the connection to their own country. They parroted their parents’ opinions… no, no, no, there was never a genocide here. It’s just that a lot of guerillas were killed.

They are the wealthy, the privileged, the willfully ignorant. They need to maintain the status quo. To keep their helicopter richness, they staunchly believe that there must be poor brown people breaking their backs doing menial jobs. Some–but not all–students felt this way or voiced these types of beliefs. The ones who kept me going were the sweet souls who would show up on Saturdays to do community service projects, to give their time and attention to their less fortunate counterparts.

Like many Latin American countries, Guatemala has a complicated history of rampant crime, violence and political turmoil. The civil war here officially lasted from 1960 to 1996, but of course conflicts between the left and the right persist to this day. The worst years of the war, experts say, were 1981 and 1982, during which thousands upon thousands of innocent, civilian Mayan villagers were tortured and murdered, for supposedly supporting the guerrillas who were fighting the oppressive government.

Astonishingly, the man who reigned as dictator in 1981 and 82, Jose Efrain Rios Montt, was recently brought to trial after thirty-one years of effort by the Mayan survivors and various human rights groups that support them. Last Friday, he was convicted and sentenced to eighty years in prison. He is now 87 years old. Yesterday’s issue of the conservative newspaper, Prensa Libre, reported on his failing health. Apparently, he is suffering from hypertension due to stress. Hmmm, I guess orchestrating a genocide would lead to some serious ulcers! So, instead of rotting in prison, he is currently at the hospital. At this time, it’s hard to have pity or metta for such a despicable person.

Obviously, there can be no justice for genocide. But this legal win is certainly better than nothing. The verdict is in. The underdogs, the trampled, the hated indigenous have won one small battle against State-mandated atrocities.

Of course, this country’s current presidente was an army General on the ground in the war in 1982 and very much implicated in the genocide as well.

In spite of these dark facts, I have no plans to leave Guatemala anytime soon. Since last June, I’ve resided in an environment much better suited to my tastes: in front of Lago Atitlan, one of the most beautiful lakes on the planet. I live a peaceful existence in a gorgeous place. I wish everyone in this country, in this world, could join me in living this way.

This morning, I read this poignant personal essay by Maya Chinchilla, a second-generation “Central American-American,” in which she reflects on her childhood experiences attending solidarity meetings held by her parents and Guatemalan exiles and watching the documentary When the Mountains Tremble. I will leave you with her eloquent words:

This trial is not about revenge. Nothing can bring back the dead or heal the trauma inflicted upon a generation of people. Instead, this is an opportunity to record the truth as public record in a Latin American country that has never witnessed anyone brought to justice within its own borders, where perpetrators continue to act with impunity. This is an opportunity to break the silence, however long it takes, to declare, as has been repeated over and over: Sí hubo genocidio. Yes. There was a genocide in Guatemala.

Grandmothers Tackle Child Abuse in Guatemala

From Grandmother Power, A Global Phenomenon by Paola Gianturco (powerHouse Books, 2012)

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Grandmothers run the Child Abuse Hotline in Jalapa, Guatemala for Plan International. It’s grandmothers who have the time to listen, the compassion to offer comfort and the wisdom to make appropriate referrals to hospitals, police or social workers.

A local social worker says, “Children, parents, grandmothers and neighbors prefer to talk about child abuse with an understanding, warm, friendly, nice grandmother.”

On the other hand, grandmothers are tough. An 80-year-old great-grandmother says: “I was visiting a young family. I knew the father had killed people in the past. He became very aggressive. His daughter hid behind me for protection. I told him, ‘Stop! I will report you.’ He grabbed a machete so I said, ‘I will call the police to take you to jail.’ I handed him a flier and urged him, ‘Read this. You don’t have to act like this.’ I had been trained and was not afraid.”

Seventy percent of all Guatemalan children are said to suffer abuse. Most physical, sexual, verbal and emotional abuse in Guatemala is not reported because people don’t believe the authorities can help and mistreatment usually occurs at home where corporal punishment is legal.

The Jalapa grandmothers run a 12-session training course to teach that good parenting includes listening, talking, hugging and smiles. Graduates build community networks and teach their neighbors how to raise children with love.


Read five other inspiring stories of grandmothers making important changes in their communities.

Gratitude for Grandmas

This post was prompted by the Grandmother Power blogging campaign.

I am grateful for my grandmas.

My childhood associations with them are of hand-stitched quilts, soft crocheted afghans, sugar cookies, soda pop, playing cards and dominoes, Easter egg hunts and plastic Christmas trees.

They both live in central Texas, and I was blessed to be able to visit them frequently growing up and as an adult too. I’m excited to introduce them to their new great-granddaughter, Jade, when we visit next month. Though both are in declining health, they are still so wonderful and loving.

My maternal grandmother is Virginia Gracia Gonzales. Here is one of my favorite photos of her as a young woman:

Young grandma gonzales

Wasn’t she glamorous? Grandma Gonzales turned 90 years old on March 18. She has Alzheimer’s and it has been sad to see her memory fade away over the years. She’s been on the decline ever since her beloved, my grandpa Gonzales , passed away in 2004. Fortunately, she is able to live in her own home in San Antonio still, thanks to her full-time caretaker, Antonia. Here they are in a more recent snapshot:

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My paternal grandmother is Marie Krischke Fajkus. She’s a country mouse, having been born and raised in Schulenberg, Texas, a rural community between Houston and San Antonio. Here she is with me as a little girl in the early eighties:

Larry's Honda3

Grandma Fajkus turned 88 last December 5. Although she now lives in a nursing home, her neighbor is one of her seven sisters. Here she is with one of her other sisters, Francie:

KONICA MINOLTA DIGITAL CAMERA]Both of my abuelitas were married young, raised three children, held down the home front when their husbands were fighting in WWII, and have always been an example of strong femininity for me. For them, I am eternally grateful.